


puppy love

by markjins



Category: SEVENTEEN (Band)
Genre: Alcohol, Fluff and Angst, M/M, Rare Pairings, Recreational Drug Use, chan is confused, happy joshua day, jihoon is lowkey a bitch but its ok, mingyu is just a big puppy ok, soonchan n soonwoo if u squint, stoner joshua
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-12-30
Updated: 2018-12-30
Packaged: 2019-09-30 08:01:19
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 5,448
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/17220047
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/markjins/pseuds/markjins
Summary: mingyu reminds chan of the sun, and he thinks maybe warmth is all he needs to get by.





	puppy love

**Author's Note:**

> hi jsjdhdksjksjdksjdksj  
> this is my first svt oneshot that i’ve ever finished n i didn’t feel like getting it proofread by ppl (besides jeo king) so it’s definitely shit LMAO  
> i looooveeee changyu so much tho like they’re so cute n underrated wtf  
> anyway i also kind of projected myself onto both chan n mingyu here bc im in love with them both  
> enjoy <3  
> (also it’s joshua day and he’s not a major character in this but still. stoner king)

Chan was 21 when he realized he had a crush on Mingyu.

It was one day, where they were at Chan’s apartment, sitting on the couch and watching a random movie while eating greasy pizza when he first felt it.

It had been a long week, and the end of exams finally passed, and Chan had been so stressed out that he could never find time to hang out with the older. So when Mingyu called him on the last day of exams, asking if he was home, Chan was more than happy to tell him yes and to come over _please._

He arrived with the food and movie options, and while the movie they picked was boring, it didn’t matter, as the two were talking over it anyway.

“So how were the final tests?” Mingyu asked while biting into his second slice of pizza.

Chan whines, “Can we not discuss them? My head will explode if I have to keep thinking about the mistakes I definitely made.”

Mingyu giggled. “Okay, then we won’t. Let’s talk about something else.”

The thing is, Mingyu just always _got_ Chan. The younger never needed to explain himself to him, because everything was just understood by his hyung, and he was eternally grateful.

“For the record, though, I bet you did great.”

The smile on Mingyu’s face made Chan believe so, too.

 

 

 

The phone rang endlessly, giving Chan nerves until the other line picked up. He let out a sigh of relief. “Hyung!”

“What’s up, Channie?”

“I got my exam results!” the boy exclaimed, and before he knew it, Mingyu was at his front door with a box of donuts and balloons.

“All of this, Mingyu hyung? How can you be so sure I did well?”

Mingyu just shrugged, “You’re you.”

Chan blushed and was about to tell him to stop with the unnecessary praise until Mingyu said, “-and I wanted donuts anyway, so even if you did horribly, we can still eat them!”

_So much for unnecessary praise._

However, after Chan had opened the envelope with his results in it, he read out all of his scores, which were straight A’s, and Mingyu picked him up and hugged him before he could even breathe.

“Hyung!” Chan yelled, laughing. “Put me down!”

Mingyu did, but hugged him again before saying, “I told you, didn’t I?”

And with Mingyu’s genuine eyes and contagious smile, Chan thought he fell in love right there.

 

 

 

It was a few weeks after his birthday, which had been quite the celebration, to say the least. He was officially an adult in America, which meant that he could do one thing: drink legally.

His best friends (all twelve of them, actually) were excited to finally drink together once the youngest of the group was able to with no restrictions, and that’s how they all ended up at Jihoon’s apartment one night.

It was like a party with 13 boys, and it wasn’t anything new, since Chan _did_ drink underage, but nevertheless, the boys were scattered across the living room, some taking shots, others singing karaoke, and Chan was on the couch.

On Mingyu’s lap.

There was nothing romantic about it, really. The older was just…..well….. _drunk._ And it wasn’t like, tipsy. Chan was tipsy. Mingyu was _drunk_ drunk. Therefore, he was being extremely clingy, and he quietly rambled about different things that the boy didn’t really understand, and long story short, Chan couldn’t stop staring at Mingyu’s lips the entire time.

Chan knew he himself wasn’t straight, per say, but he also hadn’t really come to terms with labeling his sexuality. Maybe it was because he had never dated anyone before, he always thought. But that wasn’t true. He’s dated at least five girls in his 21 years of living, and while he actually was attracted to all of them, they didn’t really _mean_ anything to him, and they didn’t last very long. Ever since his last relationship ended (when he was 17), he just never had a crush on anyone again.

Correction: he never had a crush on any _girls_ again.

No, Chan didn’t think he was gay. Maybe bi, or pan, but not gay, because he still thought girls were cute. Really cute, actually. He just…..hasn’t found another that was his type. That’s where Mingyu comes in the picture.

Mingyu, with his sharp eyes and his perfectly imperfect teeth and his different defined features, including his lips, which Chan stared at long enough to notice they were always a pretty shade of pink, and that he sometimes needed a little chapstick, but he wasn’t going to _tell_ Mingyu that, Jesus, no.

(Chan bought him some Blistex one day and reasoned that he just “had extra,” and Mingyu didn’t think anything of it, just accepted the little gift happily and started to use it every day. Chan would be lying if he said that didn’t make him overly happy.)

The karaoke music was loud, and Seungkwan being the main reason wasn’t a surprise to everyone, and the boys taking shots kept screaming as each one went, yet Chan could only focus on the ~~cute~~ dumb facts Mingyu was telling him.

“Did you know…..that a dog’s sense of smell is more than one million times stronger than a human’s?” Mingyu asks, eyes closed and smile wider than it should be.

Chan just stares at him for a few seconds before giggling. “No, I didn’t know that. If that’s so, what do I smell like?”

Mingyu’s eyes open and he looks at the boy in front of him. Chan could practically _feel_ his heart exploding, but Mingyu wasn’t doing anything to make it do so.

“Are you calling me a dog?”

“A puppy, moreso.”

Mingyu hums, wrapping his arms around Chan and pulling him a little closer. His hands were so big compared to Chan’s tiny waist, and it seriously started to overwhelm him, because Mingyu in general is _large_ and he suddenly wanted his hyung to protect him (from what, he didn’t even know) despite knowing him to be tiny on the inside.

“In that case, you smell….like beer.” Mingyu plainly mutters, earning a slap from the younger boy.

“What the hell? Way to be blunt, hyung,” Chan responds before laughing loudly with Mingyu following. At that moment, Chan notices how Mingyu’s eyes crinkle so cutely when he laughs, and how he looks like the literal sun, and how he just wants to _kiss_ him, and he thinks _Oh my God._

Chan turns back around to face the rest of the boys throughout the apartment when he feels Mingyu pull him even _closer. _His back was against the older’s chest now, and yeah, Chan is way past tipsy at the moment, which he knows because he decides to lean his head back, in between Mingyu’s head and his shoulder, and that’s something he would never do sober, Ever.__

He feels so comfortable that he could even fall asleep despite the chaos going on around the apartment. Mingyu felt warm, and every time Chan turns his head to look at him, he wants to cry out of something similar to adoration. Mingyu was very, very beautiful. Like, Chan doesn’t think he’s ever seen someone so handsome in his life. What did he ever do to be blessed with a friend this captivating to look at?

He, however, doesn’t realize how long he’s been staring at Mingyu until the latter turns his head as well. Immediately, a grin appears on his face. 

“Wanna take a picture, Channie? It’ll last longer,” he says with his eyes twinkling.

The younger doesn’t know if it’s the alcohol in his system, or just his confidence making an appearance, but he smirks. “Sure, why don’t we take it together, though?”

That seems to be a good idea to Mingyu, because he immediately takes his phone out of his pocket and turns it on, getting the selfie mode on Snapchat ready.

“Filter or no filter?” he asks Chan, who decides to go with no filter, which he also wouldn’t say if he was sober, but he’s so drunk that his appearance clearly doesn’t matter anymore. Mingyu nods at his decision and turns the flash on, since it’s kind of dark in the room due to the boys only wanting Jihoon’s colorful strobe lights to be on. (No, Jihoon didn’t have a reason to own strobe lights, but everyone went with it anyway.)

The first picture the pair take is normal, them both smiling with their teeth after Mingyu shouted “Cheese!” loudly. The second is serious, or at least as serious as two wasted adults can look. 

The third is when Mingyu leans his face closer to Chan’s, and they’re both smiling again but with their mouths and eyes closed. 

Then there’s the fourth picture. Chan doesn’t notice it at first, but Mingyu is close enough to kiss him now, and that’s fine, except when Mingyu presses the button to take the picture, his lips also press against Chan’s cheek quickly enough for the younger to almost miss it, hadn’t it been for the selfie to show as proof.

Chan immediately lifts his hand up to his cheek and turns his head in shock to see that Mingyu is unphased, giggling and saving the picture before posting it on his story.

Before he knows it, Chan is getting off Mingyu’s lap, standing up and running over to where his hyungs are playing beer pong. He grabs Joshua and clumsily drags him into Jihoon’s bedroom, and thank _God_ no one is currently fucking each other in there because Chan feels hot and he thinks he might explode if he doesn’t tell Joshua what the fuck just happened and—

“Um, everything alright dude?”

Right. Joshua is here. 

He’s also probably confused out of his mind because Chan randomly pulled him into a room and is, well, panicking in front of him for no reason.

Chan looks up at his hyung’s apparent bloodshot eyes, takes a deep breath, and speaks.

“IthinkIhaveacrushonMingyuhyungbutIdidn’treallyknowuntilnowandhejustkissedmeonthefuckingcheekwhichIknowisn’tthatbigofadealbutIreallywanthimtokissmeproperlybutheprobablydoesn-“

“Woah- woah! Relax, Chan,” Joshua says softly but still alarmed. He takes the younger’s hand and pulls him over to the bed, where they sit and fave each other, legs hanging off the edge. 

“Now, say that again, but slowly, please? I’m crossed out of my fucking _mind_ right now, if you couldn’t tell, and I need this information to be given to me slowly or else I won’t be able to give you a solid answer.”

Chan nods, and tries again.

“I think I have a crush on Mingyu-“

“Wait, dude, you’re gay?” Joshua asks, and Chan then realizes he chose the wrong person to talk to, because yeah, he _does_ look high, and the advice he’ll give will probably be half-assed and stupid, but whatever, Chan thinks, _it’s too late now._

He sighs and says, “No, hyung. Well— yes, but I’m not……just gay. That doesn’t make sense. Not the point. I think I like Mingyu hyung, and I have for a while now, and basically, he just kissed my cheek and now I’m dying because I don’t know what to think of it so like….please help me.”

Joshua laughs so loud, Chan thinks even the boys outside the room can hear him. “Shit, are you joking? You’re joking, right? Because last time I checked, uh……”

Chan furrows his eyebrows in confusion. “Last time you checked……”

“I forget what I was going to say.”

Slapping his hand to his face, Chan rolls his eyes. “You suck, hyung.”

Joshua is about to agree, until a lightbulb goes off in his head it seems, and he finishes. “Last time I checked, Mingyu and you are like, close as hell. Maybe he likes you. Wait— Don’t quote me on that. Anyway, it was just a kiss on the cheek. If you wanted it to be more you could have done it yourse-“ 

“You know what? We’re done, I’m fine, and you’re obviously not fine, so I don’t want nor do I need your advice. Let’s go back out there,” Chan smiles painfully and starts to leave the room until Joshua, again, grabs his hand and stops him.

“Hey, I don’t think Mingyu kisses just anybody, even on the cheek. Think about that.” 

Chan takes that into consideration and thinks for a minute. Before Joshua can leave, though, he asks, “By the way, what did you even _smoke?”_

Joshua laughs loudly, again, and just winks before shoving something into Chan’s hand and walking out. He thinks he hears the boy yell something incoherent, but pays no mind as he stares at the item just given to him.

 After a few minutes, Chan goes back into the living room and spots Mingyu, still in the same place as he was a while ago. The older looks up at him and smiles beautifully for the 50th time that night, making Chan’s chest hurt as he walks over. 

It’s as if all his worries are gone again when Chan plops back down on Mingyu’s lap, putting his head in the crook of his neck like before.

 “Where’d you go?” Mingyu’s voice breathes into his ear and Chan winces.

“Just had to talk to Shua hyung real quick. He’s so gone, it’s hilarious,” Chan says, but he doesn’t think Mingyu cares about the last bit, because when he looks at him he’s pouting, and now he’s thinking _what the hell he looks like a fucking puppy I want to die can I die right now Jesu—_  

“You left me for Shua hyung?”

The pain in his voice is evident, and it normally would be funny to Chan how he’s being such a brat over a simple situation, but once again, they’re both _trashed,_ so he thinks Mingyu is _jealous,_ and it makes him feel _something_ that he can’t quite describe.

Chan just laughs it off, though. “Why do you look like that, hyung?”

“Like what?”

“Ugly.”

The two burst into laughter, slapping each other’s thighs and then clapping their own hands together. Wonwoo, who’s sitting next to the pair, unbothered, says “That wasn’t even that funny,” but they don’t notice and continue to giggle together like children.

They sit there together and continue to say dumb shit back and forth that literally wouldn’t make sense to anyone else, though it makes them crack up, so who cares?

At some point, Chan wants to _die,_ because he takes in the fact that he’s so small compared to Mingyu and his mind is telling him that being on top of his lap is probably the best feeling ever. Like, everyone should be jealous of Lee Chan for being the only one to sit on Kim Mingyu’s lap.

Then, Mingyu is suddenly pulling Chan off the couch, and the older trips over a few things on the way to wherever they’re going, being the walking hazard he is, making them laugh even more.

Their destination seems to be Jihoon’s room, and Chan’s mind is kind of blurry, thinking _Was I just in here?_ but brushes the thoughts away once Mingyu sits down on the bed.

Chan proceeds with him and sits, then looks at his hyung, who seems tired, or maybe not. Did Mingyu eat the edible Chan saw him take from Wonwoo earlier? Maybe that’s it. Hold on, did Joshua give him an edible when they were in Jihoon’s room? Oh, his head is all over the place right now.

“I’m gay.” 

The straightforward statement causes the younger’s jaw to drop and he almost laughs out of confusion but instead Chan looks at Mingyu, not knowing how to respond. Just then, music in the living room starts to blare in Chan’s ears, and it’s _too much,_ like, since when was it this loud?

“I just wanted to let you know that,” Mingyu continues, speech slurred in a way that Chan finds attractive (what the fuck) “You probably don’t care. I was just saying. Uhm.”

“Okay,” Chan responds, uncertain. “That’s great, hyung. I’m uh…...proud of you.”

Mingyu nods and that’s it. There’s nothing left to say, really. Time seemed to be moving so slow and Chan’s mind is so foggy and when Mingyu darts his tongue out to lick his lips he thinks he wants to tell Mingyu _I’m not straight but I’m also not gay and I’ve liked you for months now and I want to kiss you so bad can I please do it,_ but before he can do so, he feels a pair of lips on his.

Mingyu’s lips aren’t chapped, courtesy of Chan’s generosity, so they feel smooth against his own. It’s nothing memorable, but it certainly doesn’t feel like any of Chan’s previous kisses from years ago. The older smells like alcohol and chocolate, which confirms Chan’s suggestion that yes, he did in fact eat Wonwoo’s edible, and even so, he doesn’t mind, because Mingyu’s lips are _finally_ pressed against his and shit, it’s amazing.

Then, Mingyu ever so softly cups Chan’s cheek with his hand, his cold rings making the younger shiver. He kisses the boy deeper, and Chan feels like he’s on Cloud 9 either because he’s still drunk (and maybe high) or because nothing in his life has ever felt like this before.

He thinks it’s the latter.

They pull apart for a second, opening their eyes and wanting more, and it’s not long before Mingyu pulls Chan toward him and tilts his head a bit, kissing him again and again until they’re both out of breath.

Chan is shocked, and it looks like Mingyu sees it in his face because he gives him a small smile, but he doesn’t say anything yet. They just stare at each other in silence, the only noise being their faint breathing. 

“Why…..why did you do that?” Chan breaks the quietness.

His tone is kind of confused, yet exhilarated, which he hopes Mingyu can sense. The last thing Chan would want is for him to take it as if he didn’t want him to do that, which is not the case at _all._  

Mingyu licks his lips. “I don’t know.”

The answer is plain, and Chan can’t tell what his hyung is feeling, but he doesn’t have the chance to overthink it, because Mingyu is then scooting back, pulling Chan with him and tucking them under the covers.

After Mingyu turns the light off, he moves a little to get closer to Chan, who is still _so_ fucking confused but then Mingyu wraps his arm around him and tucks his head in his shoulder and he instantly feels sleepy, his thoughts running away and warmth enveloping him.

As he drifts off to sleep, Chan hopes Mingyu can’t hear his heart panging in his chest.

 

 

 

“Lee Chan, get the fuck off my bed before I push you off myself.”

Chan opens his eyes and immediately regrets doing so, squinting because the sun is just too bright and he really wants to go back to sleep. However, he opens them again when he realizes he’s not in his own room.

Sitting up, he rubs his eyes and sees Jihoon in front of him with an annoyed expression on his face. He then looks to his side and sees another boy whose dark brown hair is peeking out of the covers.

Turning back to Jihoon, he yawns. “Good morning, hyung.”

“Why are you and Mingyu in my bed that I couldn’t even sleep in last night due to you two cuddling?”

Chan ignores how he didn’t say good morning back and tries to recall what even happened that led to this. All he could remember was him and Mingyu on the couch, him and Joshua talking, him and Mingyu kissing—

Wait.

Mingyu kissed Chan.

He kissed Chan, and then they cuddled in Jihoon’s bed before going to sleep.

“No fucking way,” Chan says to himself.

“Well, obviously there is a fucking way, because I found you both here last night when I _tried_ to go to sleep, and look at that— you’re still here. Both of you are.” Jihoon scowls, his arms crossed over his stomach. 

Chan still can’t believe it. 

“Okay, since you’re up, I’ll just wake Mingyu up too an-“

“No! Don’t. Not yet,” Chan stammers, and Jihoon just looks at him, confused, but he complies.

Chan gets off the bed and says, “I’m gonna leave. Don’t tell him that I left. Just, say I wasn’t here when you came.” He doesn’t wait for Jihoon’s response before rushing out the door and out of his friend’s apartment.

_Shit._

 

 

 

 

Chan doesn’t see Mingyu again for a couple days, which is refreshing, but worrying at the same time. Did Mingyu regret kissing him? If Chan remembers correctly, he didn’t even get any words out of the older besides “I don’t know” and that barely helped him identify his feelings.

It’s around noon on the Thursday after the “get-together” when Mingyu texts him.

**from: mingyu hyung**

**> channieeeee let’s get lunch**

_Normal_ , Chan thinks. _I guess he doesn’t want to talk about it yet._

**to: mingyu hyung**

**right now? <** 

**from: mingyu hyung**

**> uh ofc right now isn’t it lunch time**

**to: mingyu hyung**

**did NOT need the attitude but k <**

**from: mingyu hyung**  

 **> i’ll show u attitude brat** 

**> pick u up in 10 mins ^__^**

Chan laughs at that, but he’s still confused. Mingyu seems so chill, and it’s weirding him out. He expected the older to never talk to him again, but he’s fine with him ignoring the situation as long as it’s not awkward between them. 

He gets ready quickly, pulling on a white T-shirt paired with black ripped jeans and leaving his hair as is. When he goes into the bathroom to brush his teeth, he freezes.

 _Do I look good?_ _Wait, no. Who cares if I look good? It’s just Mingyu hyung. Right?_

The thoughts disappear when his phone rings, and after seeing that it’s Mingyu, Chan quickly brushes his teeth, puts on his shoes, then heads out the door. He spots Mingyu’s car immediately, and smiles when he walks over and opens the passenger door to get in.

“Hey,” Mingyu says once Chan is buckled and ready to go. He begins to pull out of the parking lot of the apartment complex, and Chan can’t help but to think he looks attractive while driving. It’s so bare minimum that he cringes, but doesn’t change his mind.

The drive is short, and Mingyu doesn’t tell Chan where they were going, but upon their arrival he sees that the older decided on a small cafe that they’ve been to plenty of times before.

When they walk in, Chan finally takes in the sight or Mingyu. He’s wearing a gray hoodie, dark-wash jeans and sunglasses that rest upon his head. Needless to say, he looks good.

(Another bare minimum statement, Chan realizes, and he hates himself for it.)

Once they’ve gotten their food, the two sit in the corner at a small round table, setting their sandwiches and drinks down before sitting themselves.

Their meal is quiet, having not much to talk about, since Chan is currently avoiding the topic of last Friday, which he assumes Mingyu is doing too.

It starts to eat him up a little, which is why he speaks without thinking. “So…..haven’t seen you since Friday.”

Mingyu munches on his sandwich and takes a sip of his drink, exhaling and raising his eyebrows. “Yeah, I’ve been kind of busy.”

Chan, frustrated, thinks his hyung still doesn’t want to talk about it, so he just drops the topic and responds with an “Ah, I see.”

It’s quiet again when they finish their food, and Chan really wants to ask Mingyu if he remembers the kiss, but he can’t bring himself to. It’d be too humiliating if he didn’t remember, and if he _did,_ then it’s obvious it doesn’t matter to him.

Mingyu drives Chan back home, the drive containing no words spoken, which is unusual. The pair were usually loud in the car, either screaming along to songs or having dumb diss battles. This time, though, they’re barely even breathing, and when they get to Chan’s  complex, Mingyu doesn’t unlock the door.

“Are you okay?” he asks the younger, looking at him with seriousness.

Chan is baffled. _Am I okay?_ _How about you?_

He doesn’t say this out loud, just nods slowly. “Yeah, why?”

Mingyu purses his lips and just waves him off. “Nevermind, I just thought- nevermind.”

Chan doesn’t push it any further, not wanting to talk about _it_ anymore, if that’s what Mingyu was even hinting at. He feels kind of sick, like he could throw up any second, so he says a quick goodbye to his friend and runs inside, wanting nothing more than to just sleep this feeling away.

 

 

 

 

An even greater distance arises between Chan and Mingyu, and the former seriously can’t stand it.

Two weeks go by after their lunch, and Chan has texted Mingyu a couple of times, asking him how he was and whatnot, but all he got was dry, one-word responses. It hurt, but what could he do?

The boys don’t hang out all together for a while, mostly because they only ever want to at Jihoon’s apartment, and the boy is always working, so there’s never time for him to invite them over. 

Chan’s glad he has Soonyoung, though.

Soonyoung is Chan’s roommate, and essentially, his best friend. He’s part of their group of friends too, and although he’s almost always out of the apartment (with Wonwoo, Chan assumes), Chan is grateful for the time they spend together.

A little while after the _incident,_ Chan told Soonyoung everything, resulting in the older hugging him and telling him that things would be okay, because Mingyu is a good person who probably just forgot, and even if he didn’t, Chan should bring it up. Soonyoung was sure that Mingyu wouldn’t be a dick about it, and that was nice of him to reassure Chan, but the boy isn’t worried about that.

Chan knows Mingyu wouldn’t hurt him intentionally, but if he doesn’t have feelings for Chan too, it’d break his heart. 

God, he’s so overdramatic.

He thinks as such when he’s curled up on the living room couch, watching some drama that’s making him feel even lonelier than he did before. Soonyoung was out with Seokmin and Seungkwan, leaving him alone to sulk and like he said, be overdramatic.

The female lead is about to start crying, because she thinks the male lead is going to die, and Chan thinks _Me as the male lead dying_ before the doorbell rings.

Assuming it’s his roommate, Chan groans and pauses the show before getting up.

“You have a key for a reason, Kwon Soonyoung!” he yells while walking towards the door. He trips over a random wire and groans again. All of this because his friend doesn’t want to use his damn key. He swings the door open with a roll of eyes before whining. “It’d be nice if you didn’t interrupt my drama sessio-“

Chan looks at the tall figure in front of him and shuts his mouth .

“Hi,” Mingyu greets him. His hair is a little messy, and he’s wearing that same gray hoodie that he wore the last time Chan saw him, and he has an expression that’s unreadable once again.

“Hey, hyung. Uh….come in,” the younger says, moving out of the way to let Mingyu in and shutting the door afterwards.

Chan goes back to the couch, sitting and staring at Mingyu, who’s looking at the floor, standing awkwardly and out of place despite being at Chan’s apartment countless times before.

“Hyung.”

Mingyu’s head shoots up, and he looks _sad._ Chan gets a sick feeling in his stomach again, but he pats the space down next to him and tells him to sit down.

He complies, but the silence still lingers, and the two boys sit a distance apart. It was like a battle of who would gain the courage to speak first.

Mingyu sighs, deep and shaky, giving Chan goosebumps even though he barely did anything. Mingyu seemed to have that effect on the boy. All he had to do was breathe, and Chan would get butterflies in his stomach immediately.

“I kissed you.”

 Chan stops breathing.

Mingyu remembers.

Chan opens his mouth, but Mingyu keeps talking. “I kissed you. That night at Jihoon’s. On the cheek, then on the lips. You remember, don’t you?”

 Words don’t even come out when Chan tries to speak, so he just nods, letting Mingyu continue.

“I know you kissed me back, but did you _want_ to?”

Chan’s heart stops beating. He looks at Mingyu directly and the tension in the air is so thick, it’s making him anxious. He’s gonna vomit if he doesn’t say what he’s feeling, oh God.

He closes his eyes and breathes out, “Yes.”

At that, Mingyu looks like he could cry. He has such a relieved expression, but somehow he still looks sad.

“Don’t look that way, hyung,” Chan murmurs. He moves closer to Mingyu, who almost backs away, but halts instead.

“I like you,” Mingyu lets out slowly. He scoots so close to Chan that their thighs are pressed together, and he breathes in again. “I like you so much that I don’t know what to do.”

Chan is going to cry, he really is, because when he takes a look at the boy in front of him, he realizes that Mingyu is his favorite person in the world, and seeing him like this, so lost and needy and _sincere,_ makes him feel pain in his heart.

Mingyu looks down again, but Chan tangles their fingers together and he looks back up, meeting his gaze.

“I like you too, hyung. Even more than you like me.”

“No, that’s not true,” Mingyu is quick to say, squeezing Chan’s hand to give reassurance. He looks so sure of his words and Chan’s chest aches just looking at him.

“You take care of me so well, Mingyu hyung. You remind me of summer and happiness and all things good in this world. I’ve never been so thankful for a person, seriously,” Chan says, and as expected, he’s tearing up.

Mingyu lets out a shaky breath, “I love taking care of you. You’re so amazing in all ways possible, and you make me so proud all the time. I’ve always supported you in everything because I care about you the most.”

They’re both crying now, but they’re happy tears, and Mingyu then lifts Chan up onto his lap, hands tight around the smaller boy’s waist.

“God, hyung…..why did we just do this now? I just want to make up for all the time we wasted, avoiding our feelings and shit,” Chan confesses, laughing a bit at the end of his sentence.

Mingyu laughs too, and Chan thinks he could hear that sound forever and never get tired of it.

“Chan.”

Said boy hums, and Mingyu grins before saying, “I’m going to kiss you now.”

Chan closes his eyes and doesn’t wait for long before Mingyu leans forward and kisses him with no hesitation. Chan sighs into Mingyu’s mouth, practically melting into him and raking his hands through his hair before Mingyu pulls away. They stare at each other, hearts thrumming and smiles forming on their faces.

Chan thinks Mingyu looks stunning like this, lips sort of swollen and eyes sparkling, and he thinks he must have gotten extremely lucky, because wow, the universe really put him with the most ethereal guy _ever._ He will never get enough of the sight in front of him.

Mingyu brushes his thumb across Chan’s cheek and shakes his head, “You are so beautiful.”

The younger flushes, playfully hitting Mingyu and telling him to stop as he covers his face with his hands. Mingyu soon pulls them away, though, and tilts his head a little to kiss Chan again.

Kissing Mingyu feels like heaven, which is cheesy, but Chan doesn’t know another way to describe it. The way his hyung’s lips feel against his own, especially when they’re _sober_ this time, kind of makes him want to make out with him forever.

When they pull apart for the second time, their noses rub together and Mingyu gives Chan little pecks all over his face until he thinks he’s covered every single centimeter, and Chan just feels so _happy_ and relieved and he really, really likes Mingyu.

That night, when Mingyu stays over and goes to sleep with his arms around Chan the same way they were at the party, Chan hopes Mingyu _can_ hear his heart panging in his chest.

 

**Author's Note:**

> twitter - @chanakgae  
> feel free to leave constructive criticism!!! even tho i know it’s eh but :D


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